Virgins Scorned

So, I watched The Bachelorette: The Men Tell All show last night. I know, you can all cyber-slap me now. But anyways, two of the rejected men were virgins saving themselves until marriage. Towards the end of the show there was a feature on the attitude of the men (and Jen) towards the virgins. There were a variety of comments, all ranging from insulting to gut-churning. But absolutely no respect given for the choices these two men made. Granted, one of those men was an all-out jerk, but that was beside the point. Basically, everyone, including Jen, made comments saying that men of "that age" should be having sex with women, and that there was something wrong with them if they weren't. There was one comment referring to men as being "animals", but in a good way.

One comment just angers me because of it's falseness. One guy claimed that two people NEED to sleep with each other in order to find out if they are sexually compatible. I just find that hilarious. What, do you go around sleeping with people, and if they aren't good in bed, then they get the boot? And if things weren't so hot in bed, how do you know it was them and not you?! This is something I have had to answer to, being both my husband and I were virgins when we married. One "friend" of mine said he would never marry a virgin because he didn't want to be with someone who didn't know what they were doing. I admit, that statement freaked me out about my own wedding night. But what I have learned is that sex, while being beautiful, spiritual, powerful, etc. is also something that is learned. And it isn't learned by going around banging every woman you meet in a night club. It is learned when two people, who have given their souls to each other, trust each other enough to make themselves completely vulnerable. It's when two people feel so comfortable with each other that they can be truly free with each other in every way. Sexual compatibility (or as the guy really meant it, GOOD SEX) is present and is made better not by experiementation and trial and error, but by a lifelong, unbreakable bond that makes the couple safe, secure, and free.

Another nauseating comment was made by the host himself. One of the virgins commented that his body wasn't a carnival ride that women could just grab a ticket for and get on (Amen!). The host then posed this question, "What do you do when you find out that your body is a carnival ride and you've been missing out?" OK, ha ha, funny comment. But really, let's take a look at that comment. Carnival ride. So, most carnival rides are maintained by dirty, greasy men who are working "the ride" with one hand and holding a cigarette with another, all the while being paid little more than minimum wage, and provided with less than desirable attire. The rides are put up and taken down with rushed fury and packed away every week or so for a bumpy ride to another county. They are maintained just well enough to actually work, but not well enough to dispell the fear that the whole thing will colapse while you are on it, sending you hurtling through the air toward your impending death. The whole time you are on it, you are screaming you head off, and most of the people who do ride it it are leaving deposits of sweat, saliva, food, drink, possibly blood, and certainly vomit. Yeah, that's how you want to think of your body? That's how you want to treat it? Fine. As for me, my body is a sleek, smooth, silver-lined, very expensive Corvette that a man turns over his entire bank account and takes out a second mortgage for; admired and respected, taken care of very well, and maintained with the utmost scrutiny. And, with only one driver.