Inside Annullments: pre-marital sex, contaception, and abortion

Here is a very interesting article that gives us the perceptions and conclusions of a canon lawyer who deals with annullments on a regular basis.

Here's one interesting point:

Why is this an issue? To begin, the problems that lead to divorce are often already noticeable during the courtship. Yet couples who engage in pre-marital relations will commonly overlook these differences. Thus the problems remain unresolved going into the marriage. Once married, however, these problems are both harder to resolve and more difficult to ignore.

“I knew this was a problem,” many women share during their interview. “But I had invested so much into our relationship.” This is a common euphemism when a woman engages in pre-marital relations. She cannot break off the relationship without feeling used. Men tend to state things more bluntly: “I had my doubts, but we were living together. So I felt obliged to marry.”

Notice how pre-marital sex creates a false intimacy within an insecure relationship. The couple feel compelled to marry. This compulsion arises neither out of love, nor from a desire to build a life together. Rather, the decision to marry arises from a guilty conscience.

This would greatly explain the high rate of divorce among couples who have lived together before marrying.

There probably would be some who diagree with points in this article, but how can we dispute what this man has actually witnessed and experienced with these couples? It's a very interesting perspective.